Serious Question

Why is cleaning so hard for me? I mean, in all honesty, it should not be this difficult to, you know, clean your room. It's not that I lack discipline in general (I mean, I lack discipline in things that are unappealing, but I always got good grades, eventually got around to doing my homework, balanced tasks, etc.), so I don't understand why I'm like a toddler when it comes to cleaning my room. Or cleaning anything. Or doing things.

I'm currently in the process of hanging up the clothes that have been in the floor. Every time I think I'm close to being done, I realize that there's another pile of clothes sitting over the chair, or another pile in the corner. Yes, part of the problem is that I have too many clothes, which is true. One of my goals this year is to try to wear everything I own, and if I can't, to get rid of it and let someone who might actually wear it have the chance. I wonder if part of it is my perfectionism. I have an interesting strain of this particular disease, in that I'm an apathetic perfectionist. I want things to be perfect, but when they're not going to be, I tend to just say "Meh... screw it." So I look around my room and I say "I want to organize my desk and get it perfect, I want to go through my dresser drawers, I want to organize my shoes/closet/clothes/underbed boxes/decorations, etc." and it becomes overwhelming and I realize I have neither the time, nor the energy (nor really when it comes down to it, the mind for organization. I never know how to organize things. My brain just doesn't work like that.) to actually do it right, so I just say "Meh... screw it." and I leave it half done, which is worse than not starting at all.

Anyway, my mom has been out of town taking care of my grandfather and she's coming home tomorrow. She does have the organization/cleanliness gene that I so sorely lack and it would make her life much easier if my stuff was clean and organized. That's like, a big deal to her. Apparently the best gift I can give her is the ones that five-year-olds give their parents because they don't have money and it's a big deal when little kids clean their rooms, whereas it shouldn't be as big a deal when your grown adult child who lives with you does it. And yet... here we are.

So, I really want to get this done, but it's already 11:30 (posting this took about 5 minutes, so that's not really keeping me from finishing) and I have to be at work at 9 tomorrow, which means I have to leave here by no later than 7:30 and really earlier, and then I have a full day of work followed by a personal training session and I won't be home until 10:30 tomorrow. So, as much as I'd like to get this done, it probably won't happen and then it will continue to linger and then I'll be the world's worst kid. And scene.